September 2016

Viewing posts from September , 2016


When you look in the mirror what do you see? Do you see your flaws and blemishes or your beauty and potential?

Many people have no problem reciting hundreds of flaws, but struggle to list off just a few good qualities or things they love about themselves.

How can you move past your insecurities? How can you embrace your God-given gifts and divine potential and see yourself for the truly marvelous and wonderful individual that you are?

The answer is to learn to see yourself through a divine filter. When God looks at us he sees our soul potential. He focuses on what we have been given, not what we don’t have. God also recognizes those weaknesses that are preventing us from becoming all we can, but instead of allowing those things to define our souls, He sees a way that we can learn and grow from them.

I did not always see myself through God’s eyes. In fact, for a large portion of my life I did what many people do, I focused on everything that was wrong with me. I could barely look at my own reflection because I would pick myself apart. It was a hard way to live and it prevented me from recognizing the many gifts and abilities I had that could bring me lasting happiness and bless the lives of many others. My self-image was truly stopping me in my tracks and preventing me from reaching greatness.

For those of you stuck in self-hate, self-criticism and self-doubt, you are not alone. Many people live this way, but there is a better way to live! Try this 3-day challenge to empower you to make a crucial shift in your life. You may find that as you implement these steps you will begin to love yourself. At the end of the challenge you will be able to see your divinity each time you look in the mirror.

3-Day Challenge (goes along with the Learning Self-Love Article)
Day 1: “Think success and it will happen.” -Thomas D. Willhite-

– Before you get out of bed in the morning, smile and think, “This is the best day of my life!”
– Before you do anything else take the time to meditate or pray. Express gratitude for the blessings in your life and imagine how you want your day to go.
How do you want feel?
Who are you going to help?
What are you going to accomplish?
– After your meditation or prayer, write down your intention for the day in your journal.
Pick one specific thing you would like to have happen that day.
– During the course of the day, reflect often on who you want to be and what you want to accomplish. This will be especially hard, but very helpful, when you find yourself in a less than desirable situation and you are put to the test.
– Before you go to bed, take time to reflect on your day. This can be done through prayer or meditation.

Day 2: “The unthankful heart… discovers no mercies; but let the thankful heart sweep through the day and, as the magnet finds the iron, so it will find, in every hour, some heavenly blessings!” -Henry Ward Beecher-

– Repeat all the steps for day one and…
– Notice all the good things that happen to you throughout the day, however small they may be.
– Before bed, record in your journal all of the good things that happened that day.

Day 3: “You, yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection” -Buddha-

– Repeat all the steps for days one and two, plus …
– Pray to be able to see yourself as God sees you. Then,…
– Sit in front of a mirror for 10 minutes without thinking any critical thoughts or finding any flaws. You may only extend mental compliments and love to yourself. Only positive thoughts are allowed. If you want a real challenge, every time you criticize yourself, start over!
– Make a list of all the good things you accomplished during the day.


Would you be surprised if I told you that the valedictorian of your local high school, a girl that was not only gifted academically, but was involved in several extracurricular activities and had many friends was suicidal and has attempted to take her own life? She showed no signs of depression, but deep inside the pressure was too much. What pressure you may ask? The pressure to be perfect, self-inflicted and totally destructive. So it is with the classic perfectionist. Anything short of perfect is unacceptable. Self-hatred and criticism are constant companions and you are your own worst enemy. An enemy that is unescapable.

Amber Stephenson was that girl. On the outside, she appeared to have it all together and was successful in the eyes of many, but deep down she was miserable. She was a classic perfectionist, constantly competing with herself and always coming out on the losing side.

Who is the typical perfectionist? Usually there are no public tears or meltdowns. The typical perfectionist seems to have it altogether, is well groomed, even beautiful. There is always a smile and they seem to be good at everything.

For Amber, she appeared to have it all together, but she was screaming inside, trapped in her own hand-crafted, gilded cage. Her friends and family had no idea of the living hell she was experiencing daily. Constant self-criticism and destructive internal dialogue can be fatal if left unchecked over a long period of time.

Luckily. Amber’s attempt to take her own life was not successful. It was a wake up call and when she recovered Amber knew that things had to change. She recognized that she was struggling with a form of depression that often accompanies perfectionism.
Amber decided that in order to become whole, she needed to look outside herself, to start helping others.

I have learned over the years that if you are in pain, you must give to match your pain and then, and only then, you just might forget yourself. That is just what Amber decided to do, becoming a nurse and recently developing an amazing program to help people who are struggling with depression and perfectionism. Today there is a depth to Amber’s smile and a God-like quality in her gaze, as if she is seeing you through His eyes.

There is hope for the perfectionist. As Amber began to look outside of herself and serve others, she felt a love that was contagious. She began to see herself through a divine filter and self-love and gratitide eventually replaced self-hatred and condemnation.

If you or someone you know is struggling with perfectionism begin by following these 3 tips:

Find someone to serve.
This could be an individual, group or charity.

Compliment yourself daily.
Give yourself a compliment out loud each day. (i.e. “I am a caring, capable mother.”)

Keep a gratitude journal.
Each night before bed write down 3 things for which you are grateful.


3 Simple Steps to Mind over Mouth

1. Write down what you eat throughout the day. This is not rocket science people! Simply write down a word or two describing the food or meal you ate. For example, write cold cereal if that is what you had for breakfast

2. Next to what you ate, write down a word or two describing how you felt an hour later. For example, you may write low energy or energized depending on how you feel.

3. Repeat this process daily for 3 weeks. It takes 21 days to create a habit. Your brain will start to recognize what foods are good for you and your body will start craving the foods it needs and not the foods your taste buds want!